


Muse

by Tsaritza_Mika



Category: Gangsta. (Manga)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-02-08
Updated: 2017-09-13
Packaged: 2018-05-18 23:10:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 14,927
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5946874
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tsaritza_Mika/pseuds/Tsaritza_Mika
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Muse - a person, especially a woman, who is a source of artistic inspiration. AU</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Being born without the ability to hear, from what he knew, many would consider that an almost painful way to live. So much of the world and its activities were the focal point of sound, that one could often find entire groups of people simply turning off their reasoning and focus just to listen to it. But while other could lose themselves in sound, Nic could lose himself in color.

The entire spectrum was his to manipulate and control as he saw fit, even in places where others felt there was no color to be had, it was always there. Brilliant reds, yellows, and oranges could be tamed and bent to his will, while soft blues, purples, browns, and grays could be coaxed into swirling arrays of raw emotion. Even those who were unaware of it as he was were at the mercy of the colors around them. The world could keep their sounds if they treasured them so damn much. He had all he needed with the near endless amount of colors at his fingertips.

At least, that's how it had been. For years his focus had simply been the multicolored world around him, finding solace in the constant presence of it all and basking in it. But recently, his world had begun to stagnate. The vibrant tones that had once caught his eye and stimulated his mind didn't dance and jump out at him as they once had, forcing him to try digging deeper for inspiration. His manager Worick, ironically his closest friend and confidant, suggested that he try new places to explore. Wandering the surrounding city with no real destination was what he'd said. It helped that he also knew sign language, using both hands and spoken words to speak to him, even if half the shit he said ended up being just aimless chat and snarky comebacks between friends.

So there he was, walking a part of the city he'd never bothered to see before, searching for something, anything that would give him back the sea of colors he missed so much. The streets in this new area seemed calm, people walking about, enjoying the day with whomever they deemed special to them. Stopping by a small cafe with a patio, he pulled out a chair and looked out over the nearby park, staring with a bored expression at the view and trying to find that lost spark.

Catching movement from the corner of his eye, he waited a moment before turning enough to look up at them, his breath stolen when he laid eyes on the young woman who had come to ask if he wanted to place an order. Long hair held up in a simple ponytail fell in a dark river behind her shoulders, some of it being left down to frame her face and accent her long, graceful neck. Her dark skin shone almost with a fine copper dust in the light that filtered down through the trees overhead, the rich color only serving to highlight her brilliant blue eyes.

This woman, smiling kindly at him as she waited to take any order he wanted, seemed to bathe in light. Colors danced over her skin, eyes, hair, shining and sparkling as they once had all those years ago when he first really took notice of them. Coming back to himself when her face turned confused, he signed out a quick apology and pointed to his ear, relieved when she seemed to understand what he meant. Glancing to the small menu, he pointed to some random drink, dumbly nodding back when she spoke slowly enough for him to understand that it would only take a moment.

Watching her leave, the apron around her waist fluttering as she walked, he quietly admired her form. Soft, feminine curves rounded over her full hips and shapely bust, as long, smooth legs tapered down to delicate ankles. The way her thin fingers tucked some errant hair behind her ear made her wrists look just as fragile, and the faint dash of color on her nails flashed with a soft, metallic glow with the simple movement. This young woman was alive with color, her very presence radiating with life from her dark chocolate hair to the glittering turquoise behind thick lashes. When she returned with whatever drink he'd pointed to, he felt his throat tighten at her smile, the gloss shining across her full lips reminding him of fresh, golden honey.

He wasn't aware of going through the usual motions, but when she turned to leave, he felt his heart sink in his chest. Reaching out quickly to take hold of her wrist, he let go just as fast, seeing the concerned look on her face. He could tell by the way those plump and shining lips moved that she was asking if he was alright,letting the had that had reached out for her falling to his lap. He never really used his voice much, preferring to either just keep things simple with widely known gestures, or staying silent when signing wasn't an option. But as he looked up at her, the sunlight dancing on her skin and hair through the trees, he managed to push past the awkward grind in his throat to try and tell her what those few scant moments of seeing her had done to him. “...m-muse...”

“Hm? Ah, th-that's sweet of you, but I'm sorry, my name's actually Alex.”

“A...A-Alex.”

“Mmhm, yeah. And, what's your name?”

“...N-Nico...las...”As much as he had managed so far, his throat closed up on him when she smiled sweetly at him, brushing some hair from her eyes as she spoke slowly.

“Hn, it's nice to meet you, Nicolas...”


	2. Chapter 2

Nicolas smirked as he sat down, his usual spot in the shade near the section of patio overlooking the park as it had become, seeing a fresh cup of ice water being set on the iron table in front of him. Crossing one leg over the other as he leaned back, he looked up at the familiar woman, still finding himself caught at the beauty that flowed from her. [Break time?]

“Mm, in a few minutes. One of the girls called in sick, so we've been busy...”

[No rush.] Sipping at the cool water as she got back to work, he simply sat back and watched her as she moved, silently appreciating the subtle shift of muscle beneath deeply bronzed skin along her legs. It had been a only a few short months since he'd been blessed with discovering this quiet little shop where his inspiration worked, and in that time, it had gradually turned toward something of a special thing whenever he came to see her. He would make sure to keep his arrival around certain times of the day, making sure she would be able to take her break and talk with her for a bit. Well, not talk in the typical sense of course, but in the time that he'd started coming there, she actually had been making an effort to try signing back to him to make things easier. She still had a long way to go, but since he could also read lips, he could manage whenever she stumbled.

Still, since that day that now seemed as if it was just yesterday at times, everyday he was able to see her, even for a few moments, he was able to produce so much more than before. It had been his usual before, large canvases smeared and blended with bright acrylic colors, but since meeting Alex and the light she brought, they all started slowly taking her shape. Clay sculptures that resembled her wrists and hands, powdered with metallic bracelets and rings, paintings that showed how he imagined her hair would flow on the wind, even combinations that would have her form pop out from the canvas, her smooth curves accented with innumerable flowers and soft petals folded from clay and worked to gradually become one with the canvas and fade into the background once more. They all ranged from intricately detailed to more simple, drastic edges, but her image was always behind it.

He'd never admit it of course, if she ever found out about any of it, he was sure she'd never want to see him again. Not that he could blame her for the possibility of that thought. Anyone would be a little disturbed at the thought that someone you barely knew was producing paintings and sculptures in your image without your immediate knowledge. Sipping at the water she had left for him, he watched as she helped a few other customers, a slight frown on his lips as he noticed that despite the warm day, she had worn long sleeves again. It had only taken seeing her a few short times to figure out what that meant, and whenever he noticed, the knowledge made his stomach tighten and churn. That boyfriend of hers was likely hurting her again. Nic had never even met the man, but whomever had the gall to make his goddess experience anything but happiness, deserved nothing less than a slow, painful end.

Hiding the urge to kill behind a small smile as she came over, he waved his hand absently as she apologized for taking so long, his urge to kill quickly calmed by her smile as she went about speaking of random things that had happened to her that week between when he'd come. Her signing was getting better, but on occasion he stopped her and corrected where she went wrong, his spirits lifting whenever she scrunched her nose in embarrassment before continuing. She was wearing her favorite earrings again that day, small, pale jade studs catching the light whenever the breeze blew by and moved the leaves above them. She'd also decided on braiding her hair as well, shining rivers of chocolate falling over her shoulder as errant strands tickled her smooth skin. He could watch her forever and never be satisfied with seeing how much she glowed so softly.

He was knocked out of his moment of admiration however, seeing her face turning worried and scared, backing up and holding her small clipboard close as a pale, lanky arm reached out and dared to yank her by her hair and arms. Nic didn't need to hear a thing to know that whatever this beast was yelling at Alex, it was all complete and total shit. Biting the inside of his cheek, he felt his blood boil again as the side of her face was suddenly backhanded, knocking her to the ground and spilling crystalline tears from those incredible eyes of hers. 

Everything was a bit of a blur after that, but when the fog cleared from his mind, Nic found his knuckles bloody, his hand hurting as the rest of him shook with remaining rage. Someone had apparently called the police at some point, as the beast that had dared to strike her was being shoved toward the street where a nearby squad car was parked. Spotting Alex over on the other side of the front patio speaking with another officer, he was glad that it seemed she hadn't been hurt further, closing his eyes and hoping that the hidden marks that pained her would fade quickly. Working to calm himself, he slowly blinked open his eyes at the careful touch of cool skin over his wrist, his expression softening at the look of concerned gratitude on her face. He even managed a smile when she signed out correctly asking if he was hurt at all, shaking his head and poking his tongue out to try making her laugh again. She always looked so much more beautiful when she laughed.

With everything cleared up as soon as that waste of skin was taken away, he swallowed against the lump in his throat, reaching out to take hold of the pen and pad she carried with her on her clipboard. Everything in life was a gamble, and though this was the hardest one in a long time, it only promised greater rewards than any others he'd had before. Even more than the day he and Worick had managed to leave that hellhole of an orphanage for a small place of their own. He couldn't quite get the courage to try speaking, but he wrote down what he wanted her to know, slipping in his business card and one for the metalwork shop not far from his studio. A change of scenery would be good for her, and Connie could always use more help around the shop, even if it was just light work while she molded her orders, and there was no doubt in his mind she would adore Alex.

Handing over the paper and cards, it was a relief to see her smile, wiping a stray tear from the corner of her eye as she nodded, that brilliant light still radiating in her eyes. “Thanks, Nic. That...I-I think that, maybe a change of scenery would be nice. I'll give her a call, though, maybe in a few days. I probably look like hell right now...”

[Never.]


	3. Chapter 3

Paint spread smoothly from his fingertips an onto the large canvas, multitudes of bright oranges, yellows, reds, and greens spreading out in thousands of soft flower petals and leaves, protecting the beauty reclining within them, her dark hair haphazardly framing her face. He could care less if some of the paint dried under his nails or dripped onto his clothes, what mattered most in that moment, was that everything around his goddess accentuated her delicate figure, giving her a warm, safe place to dream. Normally he would have let Nina, the young girl a few units down from him join him in some more of his abstract works, but his focus wouldn't be deterred that day, needing to let the vision in his mind flow and take shape.

So many of his works held her these days, and since she had actually taken initiative and spoken with Connie, he had even more chances to see Alex. His muse, and the most beautiful creature he'd ever seen. He doubted he would ever tire of seeing her; the way her nose scrunched up as she laughed, the glittering brilliance in her eyes when she was excited about something, or even when she simply relaxing in the warm sunlight, her skin shining as her hair shifted and moved in the soft breeze. Letting his finger trace down the canvas, he caught himself just looking at her again, knowing there was more he needed to do to really capture the thickness of her lashes as they rested over her cheeks before he would be done. 

Shaking his head at himself, he dipped his fingers in the paint once more, carefully blending the colors along the side of her form. Some people would consider painting with ones fingers to be childish, but it was when he worked with his hands that he felt more in control, more connected to any piece he worked on if he could touch and feel it's texture change as paint was smeared over the surface or clay was molded. He'd always had large hands anyway, so why not use them to their full potential? Feeling a tap on his shoulder, he paused and turned, nodding at Worick as he reached for a nearby washcloth to wipe the paint from his skin. It didn't bother him to find his friend in his apartment at times, they both had had keys to each others spaces since doing well enough for themselves that they could, and if anyone should, then it may as well have been the only person Nic knew he could trust with it without abusing the privilege.

“She's looking good pal, been working on her long?”

[All day. Needs more gold though.]

“You'd know best. Gotta say, if she looks half as good in person as you make her to be, she's one hell of a woman.”

[I could work forever and never match the real thing.]

“Hn, you sound like you're in pretty deep. She must have hit you hard.”

[I suppose she has.]

“So you ever gonna let me meet her?”

[Hell no.]

“Aw! Don't be like that! I'd never go for a girl my buddy had his eye on! You know this!”

[And I don't make a habit of wanting to kill my friends.]

“So mean Nic... She has no idea though, does she? About any of this.”

[...no.]

“And let me guess, if you have things your way, she never will. Am I right?”

Turning his head away from his work a moment, he frowned at the knowledge, having known since the first day he'd returned and painted her, that it was something that was probably better left to himself. [It's just better that way.]

Lifting his head to look over the many other paintings, portraits, and sculptures around the room, she took a long drag on his cigarette. “You sure? Seems to me, you should really find a way to tell her somehow.”

[I can't. If I lose even seeing her, I might not be able to work again.]

“...you are in far deeper than I've ever seen you pal.”

[If keeping all of this from her and never letting her know is the cost of seeing her, even from a short distance, then there's no question I'll pay it.]

“Mm, alright. If that's the way you want it buddy. Anyway, wanted to let you know, there's a new gallery opening up on 8th Street and Bodega in a few weeks. Think you might have a few pieces that could make the place look better?”

[I'll look through them. Let you know by tomorrow?]

“Sounds good to me. I'll get you the details before then too and what I can set up for you.” Inhaling again from his cigarette, Worick smiled at his friend, flipping some hair over his shoulder. “Alright Nic, I just wanted to stop by and check on things. Keep up the good work partner.”

[I have my muse. I'm not worried.] Watching his friend leave, Nic stared up at the painting he'd been working on, wishing he had enough skill to truly capture her beauty on canvas or other mediums. He'd still want to see her, but then at least he would have that much for between those times. She looked so peaceful in this one too, her eyes closed and dusted with the same brilliant turquoise that he used for her eyes, her hair fanned out around her and catching the occasional flower, and those same flowers reaching out to hide her modesty, careful lines accented to detail the soft muscles he most likely would never see. But he was fine with that. It was already enough to have been able to have someone so alive and shining like her come into his life. He didn't want to be greedy and start searching for more when he was sure there wasn't anything there for her. Just knowing she was alive and happy would be more than enough, wanting nothing more than being able to see that incredible smile now and then.

Blinking as he was knocked out of his reverie, he pulled out the vibrating phone from his pocket, using his cleanest finger to swipe and unlock the screen. His heart jumped when he actually saw a text from her, opening up the message and feeling his excitement grow as he looked at it.

-Hey Nico~! Connie's sending me out to go get lunch! If you're close by, you want to come with? Haven't seen you in a while, so let me know!-


	4. Chapter 4

Nic wore a bored expression as he leaned back against the wall, watching as the usual people and their guests milled about the gallery. Sipping at his water, he was glad that Worick knew when to drive the crowd from him for a bit, much preferring the brief solitude within the event than he did being the center of attention. As promised, he'd chosen four pieces he was satisfied with to donate for the opening, three paintings and a sculpture piece to be on display, his moniker 'Nico' either written on the lower corner of each piece or carefully engraved near the base before having baked the sculpture. He was actually quite pleased with himself, his choices reflecting his barren and lifeless feelings before finding himself at that little cafe, and then the brilliant surge of color and life after. The sculpture itself had actually been something of a last minute decision, choosing one which featured his muse from the hips up, bared with her hair flowing in imaginary wind as her back arched gently, flower petals and hair shielding her modesty in a way that looked as if it had been just what had been happening when time had frozen her in place.

It was a daring choice, but upon finishing it, he wanted anything more than to go through with it, showing her perfect and beautiful figure for the rest of the world to envy and adore. He'd even gone one step further, the plate just under it showing the name of the piece just below it. He was staring at it now, watching as the people stopped to admire her form and comment on her beauty. Reading their lips, he was pleased at how many appreciated his muse, glad to have been able to bring even a fraction of her shining light to them with his attempts.

Sighing quietly to himself that he would be required to try mingling at least a little, he pushed off the wall and started toward where he had spotted Worick speaking with a few people. He made it only a few steps before stopping cold in his tracks, his grip on the small plastic cup with what was left of his water grew tight and almost shook. He had known Connie would be coming, having donated a few of her metal sculptures to the gallery as well, but he hadn't even considered that she would have brought anyone but her boyfriend as her plus one. Alex had walked in right beside her, looking every bit the goddess that haunted his thoughts. An off the shoulder dress that flowed until halfway down her smooth thighs, and faded from an almost purple-black to pristine white, a thin silver necklace and bangles wrapped around her delicate wrists and neck. She'd left her hair down as well, the long, silken strands shifting with her every move. The vision of her had him remembering stories from the many books he'd read back in that terrible orphanage, ones about ancient deities that would gently spread the night sky like a blanket over the world at dusk.

Backing up to lean against the wall once more, he felt his stomach turn in knots as the two women stopped to look at his sculpture, his breath hitching as she looked at it with the same smile he'd come to be familiar with when she saw something she especially liked. Reading their conversation from across the room, he made out Alex's surprise at not knowing he could sculpt, praising the piece for how lovely it was and the detail on the hair. Just about to relax, he felt his nerves kick back up at seeing Worick start talking to them, hoping his friend and manager knew better and wouldn't let it slip that Alex was admiring something inspired by herself.

His jaw clenched, wishing he hadn't been so overconfident as to choose the pieces he had. But, Connie always brought her boyfriend to these things, so realistically there had been no risk to foresee. Watching their conversation carefully, he found some measure of relief in that Worick hadn't let anything in particular slip so far, but that didn't make the situation any less stressful. His stomach fell when Worick looked over, smirking at him and said something about seeing where he had been hiding, the three walking over and making him nervous that something he didn't want might end up being said. “Hey pal, good choices for your stuff. Barely any of this other shit measures up.”

“Hey! I have my metal sculptures in here too Worick! I worked really hard on those!”

“I didn't mean your stuff Connie, your stuff is great as always.”

“Better be.. Anyway, I'm glad to see you got things back on track again Nicolas. You seemed really down before.” Unsure of how to respond to that really, he simply nodded, the frown still on his face as he looked between all of them. 

Trying to deal quietly with his nerves, he spoke up, the awkward grind in his throat rumbling an almost shy 'thank you' before taking a sip of his water. Alex simply stood there with a smile on her face, his worry still present as he wasn't sure what she could be thinking. Setting his drink down on a nearby table, he came back and decided to try making the best of things, hoping he could possibly keep her from looking around and maybe recognizing her own visage. [I didn't know you'd be coming.]

Alex smiled at that, pushing some hair over her shoulder, the action showing off the faint glitter of her nail polish on her fingers. [Neither did I, but Connie said that her boyfriend had something come up at work, and she didn't want to come alone.]

Nodding at that, he continued, [I see you've already met my manager.]

“Come on buddy, don't sell me short here! We've been best buds since we were brats. I was placed into the same orphanage when I was thirteen, and Nic over here didn't have any other friends cause all the other kids were scared of him.”

[Not my fault they didn't like my face.]

Alex giggled at the two, looking over when Connie set her hands over her shoulders. “Hey Nicolas, maybe you should ask Alex to model for you sometime! She's got a killer body~!”

“Eh, Connie...!”

“Hey, that's not such a bad idea. You do have a body I know I'd love to get my hands on...”

“Right? So come on Nico, what do you say?”

He was a little flustered at seeing all of this playing out in front of him, though he couldn't say that he didn't like the idea. Being able to see her, having her be a willing subject, the fact that his work would end up looking like her would be easily swept under as nothing if that were to happen. Still, he almost backed out, refusing on the grounds that if she didn't want to then he wouldn't force the issue, and then he saw her blush, her hands coming up and making his heart skip a beat.

[I guess I wouldn't mind trying, it could be fun sometime.]


	5. Chapter 5

It had taken a lot of work, but finally all of the paintings and sculptures that had been blatantly inspired by Alex had been either covered up or put away. She was due to arrive any minute now, and the last thing Nic wanted was for her to think he was some sort of a weird artistic stalker or something. He still couldn't believe that she had been serious about modeling for his work, sending him a text with her availability for the next month if he wanted to work on something and she was free. It was very strange to him, and he'd had to still his nerves more than a few times that morning before getting to work. This would be the first real time that they would be alone in the same room together as well, always having seen or met her in very public places, and he had to wonder for the millionth time if he shouldn't have simply turned down her offer to spare them both the awkwardness of that first time.

His thoughts were stopped when he caught sight of the brightly flashing light that signaled his doorbell, his lips thinning as he steeled himself and kept the somewhat bored expression that he usually had on his face. Opening the door, he nodded at Alex as she waved shyly with a smile, pulling back the door and stepping aside so she could come in. He'd spent the entire day before cleaning as well, though he wasn't a slob, hoping to keep up the good impression that he'd built up with her so far. Leading her toward the room he used as his studio, he let her walk around a moment, getting a feel for the room itself so she would be more comfortable. [Did you remember your swimsuit?]

“Yes. I hope you don't mind, but I also brought a small radio too.”

[It's fine. I'll get the cooler with some water for whenever we break. The bathroom is the first door to the left right down the hall. Did you need anything before we start?]

Alex took a moment to think about it, finding herself nervous again at doing this for the first time in her life. “Um, is there anything else I need to worry about for this Nicolas? I'm, just a little nervous...I've never done anything like this before...”

Shaking his head, Nic was fast to try and set her more at ease, knowing it could be stressful the first time. [You just need to worry about staying as still as possible while I work. If you need to itch or sneeze it's fine, don't worry about it. Just let me know when you may need a break and we can stop for a while.]

Nodding at the instructions, Alex tucked some hair behind her ear and walked to the corner of the room, setting down her bag and setting up her small radio. Taking out her bikini, she stepped out to the bathroom to change, still feeling strange, but if anything she knew Nic was a professional. With some of his work that she saw at the gallery, it was silly of her to feel self conscious when it was obvious that he had a well developed knowledge of human anatomy. From what Connie had explained, even those considered to have natural talent had to practice all the time and push themselves to be better and improve, which meant that he'd had already experienced working with fully nude models before.

Bringing in the cooler as he promised, Nic set everything up and pulled out the sheet she was to use and set it on the small platform. Gathering his needed materials, he set up the paints, water, and wash cloths, setting a large canvas on the easel and stepping over to draw the curtains. Reasonably he could have left them open, but for the purpose of the piece, as well as to help Alex feel a little less on edge about her modesty, he didn't mind doing so. Sure she would be wearing a bikini, but it all boiled down to a comfort level he knew she didn't yet posses. Noticing her slowly walking over from the corner of his eye, he nodded at the sight, her pastel colored bikini hugging what little of her figure it was covering tightly. [Are you ready?]

“Ah, yeah. No time like the present I suppose. Um...how should I be?”

Nodding to her, he reached out to take her hand, guiding her up onto the small platform and picking up the folded sheet to unfurl. Draping the sheet low over her hips, he had her hold the ends over her front, turning partially away from where his easel had been set up. Looking over how the sheet fell, he adjusted it somewhat, helping it to fall the way he wanted over the soft swell of her hips. He was glad that he was able to slip into business mode for this part, unsure if he'd be able to do as much if he hadn't. Getting things the way he wanted, he stepped over to turn on the spotlights around her, moving them to get the contrast of her warm skin and the bright white fabric.

With everything set up, Nic went back to his easel to get started, taking a moment to think about the composition and what he wanted to do. Figuring it out, he poured out some of the warm, coppery brown that he had chosen for Alex's skin, dabbling his fingers in it and carefully touching the canvas. The color was a stark difference compared to the pale white of the canvas, and as he worked to smooth out her figure, he glanced over at her every so often, making sure he had everything from how her chin tilted slightly upward, to how close her arms were held to her sides.

Alex did her best to stay still, feeling a bit awkward at knowing she was essentially allowing Nic to inspect and scrutinize every detail of her skin and figure. It was a new feeling, her cheeks flushing a bit under the harsh lights on either side of her. Letting out a calming breath, she closed her eyes, listening to the soft music drifting through the quiet room. Catching the sound of a song she liked, she kept in mind that she needed to keep still, though she found herself unable to keep from humming along with the tune.

Working to add more shadows and highlights in places, he paused when he noticed her lips moving, taking a second to see if perhaps she was trying to get his attention. Blinking once he realized that she must have been singing to herself, the image in his mind too new shape, working to finish the basics of her figure quickly so he could focus on the new feelings. Needing the help of a few small brushes for details, he left her mouth slightly open, moving to add other things along her frame and the sheet. He had never felt as though anything was really missing in life, not being able to hear just being something that he figured was a natural deterrent from distraction. But watching her soft lips as they moved, seeing the muscles shift slightly in her delicate throat, he found himself wishing he could hear what she sounded like, if only for that one moment. To just confirm that she sounded every bit the angel she appeared to be.

The rest of the piece didn't take long, miscellaneous details added, and colors splashed and blended across the canvas, each one trying to capture the vision in his mind. When he finally finished, he stepped away from the easel, nodding to himself and waving to get her attention. [You can relax now. I'm done]

“Ah, really? That was fast...”

[Not really.] Reaching out, he carefully helped her down from the platform, letting her hold onto the sheet for the moment as he turned off the spotlights and opened the curtains.

“Is, can I see it?” Waiting for his response, she slowly stepped over when he nodded, tucking her hair behind her ear as she turned to look at the large canvas. Her jaw fell slightly at the blend and swirl of color in front of her, hardly even recognizing herself with how beautiful the picture was. Blues, greens, yellows, reds, pinks, they were all there and more, the image of herself surrounded by musical notes and endless shifting colors. It took a moment, but it all came together when she realized he'd painted her mouth open, blushing slightly when it dawned on her that he had caught sight if her singing to herself. Everything was so beautiful, and the longer she looked at it, the more familiar it looked. She'd seen a few other pictures similar to this that night at the gallery, and that sculpture... 

[Do you like it?]

So lost in her thoughts and wondering, Alex hadn't even noticed when Nic had come up next to her, trying to stay calm through the burning question forming in her mind. “Ah, yes...it's beautiful. Um...can I ask you a question though, Nic?”

[What is it?]

“Have...have you, painted me before?”


	6. Chapter 6

Nic watched her face carefully following her question, glad that he was able to keep his as neutral as it ever appeared. He should have known that Alex would figure things out, though he would have preferred it happen a little further down the line than the first time she modeled for him. It was hard to read her just then, most of her expression more curious looking than anything else. He could try lying, say that he just knew a lot of people, which would be true, but he didn't know any that would really resemble her though. No other option really looked to be very promising, and really, what else had he expected? Alex was smart, it was one of the things he liked so much about her. She wasn't like those other women he'd seen that were more engrossed in what was supposed to be fashionable or how to get more connected. Still, as his options dried up, he wished he was a better liar, if only to put off the possibility of losing her forever. [...please don't be mad.]

Watching her carefully, he saw her look back at the painting, then turning to see the other things about the room that had been covered up and moved out of the way. Well, if he was going down, he may as well go down in a blaze of glory. Walking over to the other end of the room, he pulled the sheets that had been hiding his other works, unveiling the large canvases as they leaned against each other, the few sculptures he'd made of her hands, shoulders and neck that were decorated with beautiful, otherworldly jewelry slowly being exposed to her. Letting the sheets fall from his hand as the last of his works were uncovered, he didn't turn around right away, not sure if he could bring himself to see the possibly terrified expression at knowing he'd done all of this without her knowing. “...I told you, when we met. You were a Muse...I meant it.”

Alex stood still as all of the other works were brought to light, her jaw slack at the sight of so many versions of herself. So many paintings, sketches, and sculptures, and none of it was exclusive to any one part of her either. It was no secret that with a body like hers, more often than not her share of both men and women often took notice of only a few pieces of her. Breasts, legs, butt, hips, they were the parts of her she heard of the most, and while she could understand to a point, she always felt that sort of admiration was lacking genuine feeling and attraction. But this, all of these...every piece had her feeling none of that. Despite the incredible colors used on the paintings and sculptures, she found herself mesmerized by the multitude of sketches. Her hands, legs, ankles and feet, shoulders and neck, her back and hips, even just her eyes alone were given so much attention and carefully shaded, it was like what he had been trying so hard to do wasn't just to see her, but to feel her as well.

She turned her head when she heard him speak, the awkward sound grumbling in his throat breaking the relative quiet in the room. Staring at his back, she tried to figure out just how she felt about all of this, watching as he stood still with his back to her. Seeing him just standing there, it was as if he was expecting her to be harsh with him, like a small animal who knew it had done wrong, and whined in apology while staying away. Looking back at the many works up against the wall, she found herself smiling softly at them. All of this, every piece had been done since they met, yet he'd never been anything but a true friend she's managed to find by just going to work. Even her new friend and boss Connie had nothing but good things to day about him, despite being so reserved and a little bit distant from everyone else.

Seeing him like that, just standing there and waiting to be yelled at and chided as if he'd done something horribly wrong, it broke her heart to see someone she considered a good friend act that way. Letting the sheet fall to the ground, quick steps took her right to him, wrapping her arms around him from behind and gently squeezing. She could feel him tense up, having expected her to more than likely leave or confront him for admiring her for so long, but that was the last thing she wanted to do. Holding him until she could feel him calm back down some, she gently tightened her arms before letting go, reaching up to his shoulder to turn him around. Her chest tightened at the deep frown on his face, looking as if he was still waiting to be told she never wanted to see him again. “Nic...”

[I'm sorry for making these without your permission.]

“Huh?”

[I'll stop if you ask me to.]

“No! I...I mean... I would have liked to know, but...”

Watching her as she tried to speak, it had been a surprise when she'd hugged him, never hoping for so much after everything. It would only be natural for her to be upset and horrified that someone she essentially didn't know was making these things of her. But watching her stumble on her words, the way she held herself and how she looked at him, she didn't appeared to be feeling that way at all. Rather, she seemed a bit flustered more than anything else. He smirked as she stumbled for what seemed the hundredth time, holding up a hand to stop her from trying when reading her lips was just becoming difficult. Reaching out slowly to brush some hair back behind her ear, he waited a moment to be sure she stopped talking, raising his hands to sign, [I'm sorry for not telling you from the start. May I ask you now though?]

“Uh...a-alright.”

[Will you be my Muse, Alex?]

“...okay.”


	7. Chapter 7

For as much as he wanted to keep from frowning, it was hard when he wasn’t used to being around more than maybe a single kid at a time. Why he had so much of a soft spot for Nina Nicolas would never really know, but it also might have had something to do with the lingering threat of her adopted father, Theo. There wasn’t much in the world that could scare him, not after living most of his life in that terrible orphanage, but Theo somehow managed. Now Nicolas sat there, on a short stool next to a small table of face paints at Nina’s birthday party, surrounded by other thirteen and twelve year old kids.

At first, some of the other kids had been poking fun at Nina for having face painting at her party, but after Nic had managed to paint a simplified version of ‘Starry Night’ on a girl’s face, everyone suddenly had to have one. Dipping his brush back into the black, he tilted his head to make sure he hadn’t missed anything, finishing up making the child in front of him look like the cat from ‘Le Chat Noir’. Nodding when he was done, he shook his head as the boy smiled and ran off to join the others playing on the neighborhood playground.

Glancing out over the crowd, he nodded when Nina ran over to make sure he got a piece of her cake, her face covered in glitter and painted tiger stripes. “Hey Nico, I know you don't like sweets much, but it's vanilla, so...”

Taking the small plate from the girl he messed her hair and took a large bite, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. The girl really was far too sweet for her own good, and practically everyone she knew that was older than her doted on her every whim. Seeing a large smile come to her face as she turned and ran back to one of her friends, he shook his head with a smirk, eating up the small piece of cake she'd given him. 

A few others he knew had stopped by to give the girl their well wishes, Worick had already come by and dropped off his gift earlier, it was yet another time when Nic rolled his eyes, but this time it was in amusement. It was no secret that Nina had a little crush on Worick, and it had always been obvious by the blushes and slight stuttering whenever she spoke with him. It was cute really, when normally she was so sure of herself to suddenly be thrown off like that.

Finishing the small piece of cake, he set his plate aside and wiped at his mouth when he caught some movement in the chair next to him. Turning to find out what the next kid wanted, he blinked when he found Alex sitting there, a shy smile on her face. “Hey Nic. So, Nina got you to come, huh?”

Nodding, he wiped his hands and mouth on his napkin, [ You come with Connie?]

[ Yeah, she made Nina a few little statues of small animals to give her, and I didn't want to come with nothing, so we stopped nearby and I brought her some berets and cute hair ties.]

[ She'll like that.]

[Good to know. I haven't really seen her much, but that's what Connie said too.]

Nodding to her, he turned to watch as the group started thinning, parents and guardians coming over to pick up Nina’s friends. Turning back to pack up the small gathering of paint and brushes, he packed them up in the small case he’d brought with him, [You guys come late on purpose? Looks like everyone’s getting ready to leave.]

[Yeah, didn’t really want to bother with a crowd much. Did you need to get back to work?]

[Not really. I do have pictures to work on, but I have no deadline for them.]

Smiling shyly, Alex glanced to the paints nearby, looking up at him through her bangs. Reaching over to tap his knee and get his attention, she felt her cheeks warm a little as she signed out, [You think, you could paint my face while I’m here?]

He was a bit surprised at the request, though he certainly didn’t mind either. Looking over at his paints, he nodded and took up a small, thin brush as she pulled her hair back and out of the way. Giving a few moments thought to what he could do, he nodded to himself and poured out some more paints, mixing a few so that he wouldn’t be slowed too much. Waiting for her to find a comfortable position, he dipped the bristles into the blue he’d just mixed, bringing it up to her face and carefully blending the edges so it looked as if it faded back into her skin. His face grew focused as he worked, thin layers of varying blues, greens, pinks, and yellows slowly building upon one another as the air around them started growing cooler.

Alex closed her eyes as he worked, her heart skipping a beat as she felt his free hand under her chin. She hadn’t asked for anything in particular, but with what she knew he could do, she trusted him to not put anything embarrassing on her face either. Enjoying the brief touches here and there, and the soft feel of the brush against her cheeks, she opened her eyes when he tapped her knee, waiting as he picked up the wide mirror to show her what had been done. Her breath caught as she saw the brilliant colors blended across her face, the soft pink petals of water lilies bringing out her eyes and the faint color on her lips. Smiling at him as she lowered the mirror, she nodded as she signed out her thanks, [It’s beautiful Nicolas, thank you.]

[Not as good as the original.]

[Doesn’t have to be, I love it. I wish I didn’t have to eventually wash my face.] She giggled as he shrugged, taking her hair out of the loose tie and letting it fall back around her shoulders. Reaching up to tuck some hair behind her ear, hoping that she didn’t blush, she looked over the few who were left as the kids started heading back home. [It’s still early, did you maybe want to walk around a bit with me? Haven’t seen you much lately outside of our modelling...]

Blinking at her offer, he didn’t really have any reason to refuse, but... No, he wanted this time with her, had for a long time but never dared to hope for. Still, he couldn’t allow himself to see this as anything more than spending time with a friend, which really, even that much he was fine with. Nodding, he stood and slipped the strap of his paint case over his shoulder, waiting for her to follow suit. Making sure to wish Nina and Theo a farewell, Nic kept his pace with Alex as they made their way toward the street from the small playground inside the park. Once on the sidewalk he paused and signed out if she wouldn’t mind making a quick stop at his condo to drop off the paints.

Smiling back at him with a nod, they headed back and did just that, stepping back out and onto the street to head toward a nearby outdoor mall. It was a nice area, with shops on two levels with plenty of places to eat and look at; perfect for two friends just needing to walk around a bit and catch up a while in the warm evening. Walking by the shops, it felt good to be there with her, despite not really liking to be among crowds very much. She was interesting to watch as they walked by the shops, seeing her as she occasionally stopped to either marvel or cringe at the things displayed in the windows. As the sun lowered and the lamps lining the walkway lit up, Alex reached over to gently tug at his sleeve to get his attention, pointing over to a small restaurant near one end of the halls. 

He smirked at her and rolled his eyes, nodding and following her inside to see if they could get a table. A few people around them leaned over to compliment the paint on her face, making him smile slightly as every time she seemed so happy and a bit shy. With the evening getting later, they left once done with their dinner, falling into step with her as he walked her back toward her apartment. Lost in his thoughts, his eyes went wide when he felt her fingers slip between his to hold his hand, shoulders tensing as he wondered if he should say something or not. Glancing to his side, he couldn’t quite see her expression, swallowing past the lump in his throat and simply closing his hand around hers, enjoying the moment for what it was as they neared the apartment she shared with Connie. Besides, he may never get anything like this again, and he wanted to savor the feel of her delicate fingers between his own.

Reaching the entrance to her building, he kept his face neutral as her hand lipped slowly from his, nodding to her as she stepped up to the door and paused before stepping inside. [Don’t forget to call me if you need me again, Nicolas.]

[I won’t. Be sure to lock up behind you.]

[I know, sweet dreams.] 

Watching her as she stepped into her building’s lobby, he glanced down at his hand, the one that had held hers so briefly. ‘They will be...’


	8. Chapter 8

Nicolas nodded as Theo ran over a few things he would need to know while looking after Nina. The man had been asked to attend a medical conference over the weekend, and he wasn’t able to take Nina with him, prompting him to ask if she could stay with his neighbor so she would be close to home in case she needed or wanted anything. Taking the list Theo had made up of phone numbers and contact names in case of an emergency, he nodded with a quiet grunt, reaching down to mess Nina’s hair. [She’ll be fine. She’s a good kid.]

“Anything happens to her and I’m cutting you up for parts and selling them on the black market.”

“Eww!” Nina giggled as the two men finished going over directions for her care, setting her bag off to the side near the hallway toward the rooms in Nic’s condo. It was always funny how possessive Theo could be whenever it concerned her, especially when a lot of people would question if the man cared about anything with how apathetic he could seem.

Waving off Theo once everything was set, Nicolas stuffed the paper in his pocket and went over to take up Nina’s bag. Setting it in his spare room, he quickly set up the futon for her and showed her where the towels were in the bathroom for whenever she needed. Finished with making sure she knew where everything was, he turned and walked back into his studio, pulling out a large canvas and paint. It had become a little more rare these days, since Alex had started coming to model for him, but Nina used to come over frequently and paint with him, and he figured they could catch up a bit on that during her stay. Despite claiming that she wasn’t that into art, she had a good eye for color, often giving more life to their abstract pieces than she often realized.

The two painted for a while, the time getting away from them as splats and smears of colors were pressed to the canvas that was almost as big as she was. Glancing up as he caught sight of the bright flashing light of his doorbell, Nicolas smeared some paint across her cheeks as he turned to go answer it. Grabbing a cloth to wipe his hands, he blinked as he opened the door, seeing Alex standing there happily, her hands held behind her back. [Were we working today?]

“Mm, no. I was just nearby and...wanted to see you. If, that’s okay...”

Nodding, he tensed up at the thought that he could have made her think she hadn’t been welcome to visit whenever she wanted, he just hadn’t thought she would really. [Sorry, come in.]

Smiling to him, Alex pulled some hair over her shoulder as she walked inside, running her fingers through long, cool strands. Hearing noise from the studio, she tilted her head curiously, “Someone else here?”

[Theo’s going out of town for the weekend. I’m watching Nina while he’s gone.]

“Aww, you can be so sweet on her...”

Pouting at her, he reached over and playfully pushed the side of her face, heading back toward the studio and knocking on the door frame as they came in. Nina’s face lit up when she saw Alex come in behind him, waving her small, paint covered hands. “Hi Alex!”

“Hi Nina, so you’re gonna be staying with Nicolas this weekend?”

“Yup!”

“Well that’s sweet of him...”

Pouting at the smile he saw on the two girl’s faces, Nic tossed the rag he’d cleaned his hands off with near where the paints had been set, moving to put away the large canvas so it would dry. Coming back, he leaned over to pick up Nina, setting her to hang over his shoulder and smirking as he felt her laugh. Ushering the two out of his studio, he playfully tossed Nina down onto the couch, turning to lean against the arm and look to Alex. [Was there something you had wanted to do?]

“Mm, nothing special I guess, though if it’s okay, I could just hang out with you two for a while?”

“Yeah! Nico, let’s have some fun with Alex!” Conceding to her, he nodded and carefully let himself fall back to land on her, smirking as Nina flailed and laughed. “No! Alex help! Nico’s heavy!”

Alex giggled at the sight, coming over to play at him being too heavy for her to save Nina from him as well. The small game continued for a while, with each of them pulling dead weight at random times to trap and frustrate the others. There were a few other inane games and such that they played as well, and as the day grew later, Alex went to check on what they could possibly do for dinner for the three of them. She cringed when she opened up Nic’s fridge, finding almost endless amounts of instant meals and microwave dinners carefully packed to make sure he could fit as many in there as possible. “Ah...Nicolas? How have you managed to stay so healthy and eat this crap?”

[Tons of water and eating out with Worick.]

“...We’re going to the store, and then you’re making room for some real food stuffs.”

[But the last time I tried cooking for myself I nearly killed myself with all the cuts. Couldn’t paint for almost a month. I’m really a horrible cook.]

“As if I needed much convincing after seeing that fridge...”

[Why is this such a big deal? They all say ‘healthy’ on them.]

“...Nina, sweetie come on, we need to go to the store for some things to make for dinner!”

“Okay!” Rolling his eyes a bit at apparently being outvoted in his own home, Nic followed as they all left and headed down toward the small market a few streets down. Pushing the cart as Alex and Nina went through each isle, he leaned forward on the handle, smirking at how well they got along. Glancing over at some movement, his frown deepened with embarrassment as he caught what the two old women were speaking to themselves of. So...they looked like a cute family did they?

Reaching quickly to the list Alex had made up, he found the first thing on the list that wasn’t crossed out and quickly signed that he would go grab it, turning and leaving the cart with them so he wouldn’t be caught with the faint blush on his face. He did have to speak a little when relaying to the butcher what cuts of meat he was there for, but it was better than being caught with a flush on his cheeks. Finding them once he was done, Nic carried their bags and they headed back toward his condo, stepping up to unlock the door as Alex and Nina giggled about something he hadn’t caught.

It took a lot of creativity, but Alex managed to rearrange all of Nic’s instant and microwave meals to make room for the individual foods, nodding to herself as she passed out some water for each of them when she was done. The rest of the afternoon and evening went by happily, with various games, some more painting and a little sculpting together to keep them busy between whatever movie or television show Nina wanted to watch. It was amusing to watch Alex and Nina as they made dinner for them, the young girl eager to learn what she could from Alex and trying hard to do everything right the first time. After dinner, Nina changed into her pajamas and insisted that she would last through another movie before bed, refusing to listen when both Nic and Alex pointed out how late it had gotten already.

He couldn’t say when it was that he had drifted off, but Nicolas woke early as he usually did, slowly blinking open his eyes and finding that he had fallen asleep with Nina on the couch. Confused for a moment when he saw the television had been turned off, he spotted a sheet of paper on the coffee table where the three of them had sat the large bowl of popcorn the night before. Glancing around, he looked to see if Alex was still there or not, moving to sit up slowly so Nina could continue to sleep. Picking up the paper, he rubbed at his eyes to help them focus, leaning forward and setting his elbow on his knee to read it. 

'Morning Nic! You and Nina must have been really tired, you both fell asleep so quick last night! I probly would have joined you two if I didn’t have work today. I did my best to lock up before heading home for the night, but I made sure to leave you guys with instructions and everything ready for you to make something good for breakfast whenever you’re up. It’s all in the fridge okay?  
Anyway, I hope you both have fun while she’s there with you. Let me know if you’d like me to come back and make lunch or dinner or something okay? Anytime is fine, so just text me! Gotta head off to work, Connie has me opening the shop, so I’ll talk to you later. Give Nina a hug for me okay?

Alex'

Nicolas smiled to himself as he read the note, setting it back down on the coffee table and reaching up to rub at the back of his neck. Carefully standing up, he walked slowly down the hall to his bathroom to splash his face, turning on the light and freezing at what he saw. His reflection was there, as it should be of course, but it wasn’t just his reflection that left his heart skipping a beat. It was the faint, discolored shine in the shape of lips that rested just under his left eye over the high cheekbone.


	9. Chapter 9

Leaning back in his folding chair, Nicolas looked with a thoughtful frown at the large sketchpad in front of him, wanting to be sure that it was done before removing it and setting it aside for sale. Every year the city organized a fair, with rides, food, a stage for music, while making room for the city’s independent crafters and artists of all kinds. So it went without saying that Worick had talked him into doing it again. Sure, it did get his name out more, and with prints, sketches, and a few small sculpture replicas marked for a lower price, they could often make more money than when selling or leasing one or two pieces to a gallery.

Of course it would also have nothing to do with being front and center for every attractive woman who came by to get a closer look of any of the pieces they had set out. Nope, nothing at all. If only Nicolas had it in him to play that stupid for longer than half a second. Deciding he was finished with the sketch, he tugged it out of the large pad and set it on the table Worick used as something of a desk for the event, needing to tap on his shoulder to get his attention on him rather than the low-cut shirt of the well-endowed woman he was talking up. [This one’s done and signed. It can go in the book.]

“Hey, nice one pal. Mm...thinkin’ maybe forty-five since it was a quick one on site. Sound good?”

[Just as long as it doesn’t end up going for less and carried out in her cleavage.]

“Aw, come on Nic. What kind of manager would I be if I let that happen every time?”

[One that still owes me fifty bucks for the last time it happened.]

“I thought we agreed to wipe that clean since I was able to talk you out of doing that ridiculous workshop thing at the community college!”

[It was, before you tried taking home the administrator. People are gonna start thinking I’m pimping you out rather than doing what I actually do.]

“You mean I haven’t been pimping myself? Damn, I must be losing my touch...”

Rolling his eyes with a pout, Nicolas playfully shoved the blond’s head, crossing his arms over his chest as Worick laughed at the banter. “Hey, come on pal. It’s a fair! There’s fun all around us!”

[Maybe for everyone who isn’t working...]

“Hey man, I ain’t holding you here you know. Why not walk around a little and find something to eat? We’ve been at it for a few hours already anyway. Go on and grab some lunch.”

[You’re suggesting this knowing I could just not come back?]

“You wouldn’t really leave me to do all this by myself, we both know this...”

[From where I’m standing it looks like you wouldn’t be lonely long...]

“I’d still be able to sell shit though.” 

Rolling his eyes with a smirk at the banter, Nicolas took Worick’s offer and headed out to wander the fair for a bit, feeling a little better now that he wasn’t in the back of the small, confining booth. Glancing around as he walked, he had to admit that things looked good that year. Not far from the area where his booth and other local artist vendors were rows and rows of games and food, and there even seemed to be a stage toward one end where people were playing music. 

People at least seemed to be really happy with things though, everyone going around with large smiles on their faces, children dragging parents by their hands as they ran to the next thing that caught their attention. Coming to a large booth cluttered with all manner of metal sculptures, he spotted Connie in the back as she spoke to what looked like a potential customer. While he wasn’t surprised to see her there, he looked around curiously, knowing that if Connie was there, Alex more than likely was as well. Of course, this wasn’t the first year Connie had set up a booth at the event, but it was where she had a large corner booth next to the food vendors, something she had been fighting for the last few years and had never been able to get.

“Nicolas, hi! Isn’t this great? They finally gave me a space big enough to have more of my stuff on display!”

[I see that. Business been good for you?]

“Been amazing! The larger space makes it a lot easier, too. I don’t have to have so many of the others in my book since they won’t fit and have to only have pictures.”

[That’s good. Marco help you set up again this year?]

“Yup! He’s been in the back and doing all my cash handling since it’s been hard to see each other lately.”

Nodding at that, it was good to hear that those two were able to make it so they could spend the day together. It wasn’t either of their faults that Marco had a job that kept them apart more often than not, but the two of them seemed fine about putting in the extra effort that distance often left them with. Bringing up his hands again, Nicolas wasn’t able to say anything else as a large hand slapped over the back of his shoulder, the force making him lean forward and stumble a bit. With so many people around, it was hard to tell whenever someone may be coming up behind him. “Yo! Nicolas! Been a while!”

[Hey Gal. How’s the tat studio?]

“Got a convention in two weeks actually. A few of the girls with my best work will be going with me too.”

[Good for you.]

“Isn’t it? But hey! You need to spill! Heard from Worick you’ve gone and found yourself a girlfriend!”

[Goodbye.] Nicolas wasn’t one to speak on private matters when it wasn’t related to his supposed lack of a love-life, or anything resembling one, so like hell he was sticking around for any of Gal’s digging. Taking off, he didn’t have to turn around to know that the man was hot on his heels. Turning down a few isles, he ducked between some of the food and shop vendors. Waiting a few moments once he was sure he’d given Gal the slip, he poked his head out, checking each direction before coming back out.

Reaching up to scratch at the back of his head, Nicolas finally glanced around at his surroundings, not having realized that he had apparently made it to the amusement side of the fair. Games, a few more food vendors, and rides were all around him as people passed, each with smiles and the occasional treat or stuffed toy that had been won. Wandering down the isle, he flinched when he felt a tap on his shoulder, worried that Gal may have found him again and turning quickly with his hands up. “Ah, Nicolas, sorry if I scared you...”

Blinking at seeing Alex there, he relaxed, rubbing at the back of his neck now that he knew he didn’t have to worry about it having been anyone else. Waving to let her know that it was fine, he took a moment to take in her image, not having seen her in the few weeks since Nina had stayed with him since they had both been busy. She’d left her hair down, the faint evening breeze catching the long strands and shifting them over her shoulders, the lights around them flashing over her favorite jade earrings and nail polish. A clingy, black tube top hugged her delicate curves, showing off her slim waist and generous cleavage, while a pair of bright white jean shorts showed off her long, shapely legs. The outfit was simple, but even then she managed to make it bring out her features wonderfully.

Flushing slightly as he recalled what else happened the last time they’d seen each other, he looked away for a moment, glad that when he faced her again that she had the same smile on her face as last time. [It’s fine. Was getting away from someone annoying.]

“Aw, an overzealous fan of your work?”

[No, fellow business acquaintance. Surprised you aren’t helping Connie.]

“Oh yeah, she gave me the day off since Marco had the time to help her out in the back. She doesn’t get to see him very much, so I figured it was alright. Were you just here on your own too?”

[I have a booth. Worick’s there now. I was bored, he told me to go for a while.]

Nodding to him, Alex pushed a bit of hair over her shoulder as another breeze came down the aisle, glad that the glow from the lights around them would most likely hide the slight flush on her cheeks. “Then...if you’re not doing anything, would you maybe like to come around with me? I never got the chance to visit one of the fairs before...not really.”

Still a bit on the nervous side, he hid it well as he nodded, flushing slightly when she reached out to take his hand and tugged for him to follow her. It was strange, knowing that she had modeled for him quite a bit recently, but that even the times his hands may have brushed over her skin, he had always been in business mode. Other thoughts were always phased out during those times, nothing else mattering in the moment but somehow managing to reproduce the visions of dancing color in his mind. Now though, he could feel the cool touch of her skin, her thin fingers wrapping around his hand, and the sharp contrast of her deep, cinnamon skin against his own lighter complexion.

Nicolas managed to relax a little as he let Alex lead them around, stopping at a few of the games and random food stalls, a faint smile coming to his face as she grew frustrated at being unable to time the game correctly and knock the stuffed with into the plastic revolving cauldrons, keeping her from winning a large, stuffed frog toy. So distracted by the glow of her smile as they went along, he’d never noticed that the sun had long since begun sinking low in the sky. Following Alex as she tugged on his hand, he frowned when she stopped, carefully squeezing her hand to get her attention back and tilting his head questioningly. 

“Hm? Ah, sorry Nicolas. I was just listening to the announcement just now. The fireworks are going to start soon, should we go see?”

[Sure.] He couldn’t say ‘no’ to that excited smile on her face. Well, that wasn’t true, he could, but it would only have been in jest. A simple tease to frustrate her as he did with Nina and others. Walking with her to the nearby field, he sat down with her in the cool grass, tensing slightly when she not only sat so close, but also slid her arm around his to take his hand again. It was true that compared to Worick, Nicolas was by far more innocent of the two of them, but even he had to wonder at all the sudden contact. His cheeks flushed again as Gal’s words came back to him, glancing down at her from the corner of his eye as that word rang through his head again. Girlfriend... 

Trying to clear his thoughts from his mind, he turned his head up to watch the bright flashes of light spreading through the sky, shining colors sparkling before fading away against the stars. Seeing so many brilliant colors, it somewhat reminded him of when he first started really noticing them as a child. Vivid reds and golds, shining whites and silver, the cool calming feel of blues, purples, and greys. Each one in their own way helping to ease the dreary life he’d started in that dark and cold orphanage. Color had been his entire world before that day, the one where he’d met Alex, his muse who lived and breathed colors back into a life that had lost them over time.

Catching a bit of movement from the corner of his vision, he turned his head to look over at her, surprised at just how close she really was. The brightness from the fireworks lit up her eyes every time they went off, tranquil blue illuminated with multiple colors, her rich, dark skin highlighted each time another color bloomed in the sky. Losing himself in those swirling colors, he never noticed just how close they were until he felt her soft breath against his lips, thoughts stopping completely when he felt her gently press shining lips against his own.

Soft, warm lips pressed against his, colors dancing, swirling, and shining in her eyes, across her skin and in her hair. His eyes drifted shut, reveling in the softness and strange feeling of calm that settled over him at the intimate touch. It was odd, to have such a feeling like that, the feeling that even if nothing else ever came of this moment, he could still be satisfied with having been able to receive this much. He had his colors back, his drive and inspiration to craft and create once more. Alex had given him so much in such a short time, and if she let him, he wanted more than anything to have the chance to give some of it back. 

Slowly blinking own his eyes when he felt her pull back, he smirked slightly at the blush that came to her face, amused as he watched her try to find words and apparently reason away the last few seconds. Coming back in quickly to silence her, he held the sweet contact a moment, pulling back far enough to be able to see her lips, his voice rough and grinding in his throat. “...be with me?”

“...okay.”


	10. Special - Praying

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Special tiny chapter dedicated to my friend Charlotte (beta-sheratan), who wanted so badly for the Kesha song 'Praying' to be one about Alex
> 
> Please be kind as I honestly have no real idea on how real courtrooms are conducted, and was not about to take movies/tv at their word since I know they aren't very accurate either. Thank you for reading~ <3

Nicolas watched with a frown as Alex took another deep breath, her steps slowing slightly as they neared the court house. They had both received letters a few days prior about needing to be present for her ex boyfriend Barry’s court hearing, and it was obvious that needing to think back on her time with him had been weighing heavily on her shoulders. She really had been through a lot while she’d been with him, and the last time she’d seen him had been back when Nicolas had nearly beaten him senseless for his actions. Frowning at seeing her so withdrawn, he set a hand on her shoulder, frowning at the attempt at a smile he was given back.

Still, to see her even standing out there in the parking lot said more than enough for those that knew her. Connie would text or email frequently whenever it seemed as though she was either having trouble in some way, or she had found Alex huddled in her room, trapped in her memories of when he’d terrified or beaten her. Even just knowing those times still happened made him wish he could beat the shit out of him all over again. She never told anyone many details about those times, but just seeing the fear on her face and how badly she shook from the trauma was enough to leave him seething. Alex had made a lot of progress, but demons like hers could hardly be so easily dismissed, regardless of how hard one fought.

~Well, you almost had me fooled~  
~Oh, and after everything you’ve done~  
~I can thank you for how strong I have become~

Going up the steps and checking in with her, Nicolas took her hand as they waited on a bench in front of the assigned courtroom, his frown deepening as he felt her trembling. It seemed like forever before the bailiff waved for them to go inside, taking a seat near the jury stand. It was a small gathering of people sitting in there, but without knowing any of them, he wasn’t about to assume any of them would think very kindly of Alex. These things were often painted ridiculously, making it seem as if it was somehow the victim’s fault that everything happened rather than someone just being a disgusting piece of shit.

After a few minutes, he and Alex stood when told as the judge came in, glancing sidelong at her when he felt her tense as they asked Barry to come in with his security escort. Still, she kept up a strong front, her expression looking far colder than he knew her to be for anyone. Watching carefully at the woman who had been provided by the court to relay things in sign language, he was able to more easily follow along what all was happening, giving Alex a nod when she was called up to take the bench.

~‘Cause you brought the flames and you put me through hell~  
~I had to learn how to fight for myself~  
~And we both know all the truth I could tell~  
~I’ll just say this is I wish you farewell~

“Ms. Benedetto, do you swear to tell the truth and nothing but the truth so help your God?”

“Yes sir.”

“Thank you. Now, would you please describe what happened to you while you were involved with Mr. Abbott?”

“Y-yes, sir.” She took a deep breath, her hands kept folded tightly in her lap as she fought against the urge to cry and hide from the man sitting not far from her in the courtroom. “At first, when we met, he had been nice…a real gentleman. Then, he would get angry when I went out with friends, yelling and throwing things around. I had to let him know when I was just going out for work, and even then it…he was so angry with me…”

“Can you describe a time he was especially violent toward you, or did things never go beyond these kinds of acts?”

“No, they…he’d hit me. Hitting me, yelling at me when I, I thought I hadn’t done anything worth that kind of anger. And, a few times, he… he drugged me, and I’d wake up, other men I hadn’t, ever seen or met before would be… But I couldn’t move, couldn’t do anything to, to fight back…”

~I hope you’re somewhere praying, praying~  
~I hope your soul is changing, changing~  
~I hope you find your peace~  
~Falling on your knees, praying~

“And are able to recall how many times Mr. Abbott did these things?”

“I…by the end, I don’t know exactly. There, didn’t seem to really be any rhyme or reason to any of it-” Alex flinched when she heard the screech of the hardwood chair Barry sat in on the tile as he moved to try interrupting her, his lawyer speaking in strong, hushed tones to get him to be quiet and not do or say anything more damning.

“Ms. Benedetto, considering your claim of being drugged by Mr. Abbott, are you certain these things actually happened?

“Eh, what do you mean?”

“Well, many psychedelic drugs can have very…convincing, hallucinations. So it wouldn’t be far fetched if what you say you experienced would have simply been fabricated by taking them-”

“…why, why would I just…make any of this up?”

“Well there has been precedence for some women to claim, often outlandish and cruel things of their former partners in order to get some sort of satisfaction for the emotional pain caused during a breakup…”

~I’m proud of who I am~  
~No more monsters, I can breathe again~  
~And you said that I was done~  
~Well, you were wrong and now the best is yet to come~

Alex stared at the man with disbelief, glancing over and seeing her anger and frustration reflected in how Nicolas was sitting. “I don’t know who you think you are, trying to make it sound like I would just make all of this up because of something as trivial as a ‘bad breakup’!” Pointing directly at where Barry sat, Alex let her anger show, her eyes flashing coldly with a tight frown. “That…man, sitting right there, beat me, left me scared for my life multiple times, drugged and allowed strange men to rape me, and then attempted to ‘teach me a lesson’ in public while I was at my former place of employment! Everyone there saw what he was trying to do, and none of your damn accusations of myself or other women can ever change that!”

“Ms. Benedetto, please calm down-”

“Your honor, I will be calm when I’m not dismissed simply by having been born with ovaries!”

~'Cause I can make it on my own~  
~And I don’t need you, I found a strength I’ve never known~  
~I’ve been thrown out, I’ve been burned, I’ll bring thunder, I’ll bring rain~  
~When I’m finished, they won’t even know your name~

~You brought the flames and you put me through hell~  
~I had to learn how to fight for myself~  
~And we both know all the truth I could tell~  
~I’ll just say this is I wish you farewell~

Unable to help from laughing at that, Nicolas chuckled deep in his throat at how fiery she could be at times, and thankfully this time it had been more than warranted. The defender was an asshole defending an asshole. Watching as Alex was allowed to step down, he nodded when the older woman up front caught his attention and signed that he should step up.

[Mr. Brown, do you swear to tell the truth and nothing but the truth?]

[Sure.] Sitting down, the woman who was there to sign for him let him know she was there if he needed clarification for anything said, taking a seat where she could see everything and could be seen.

“Now, Mr. Brown…you assaulted my client.”

[Only disappointed that someone stopped me.]

“…ah, y-yes, well… Um, can you please, explain why you did this?”

Nicolas raised a brow at the ridiculous question, surprised that the man would actually ask such a stupid thing. [You’re kidding right?]

“Uh, no… Why did you act against Mr. Abbott in such a way?”

[Wouldn’t you if you saw a friend being roughly handled and obviously scared of threats of violence?]

“W-well, you certainly could have tried, speaking to him first?”

[In case you didn’t notice, assholes like him don’t really know when to shut the fuck up.]

“Mr. Brown, please watch your language. This is a court of law…”

[Oh shit, sorry.] Smirking at how frustrated the man was, soon after Nicolas was also asked to step down, taking his seat next to Alex again and leaning back. Watching as they heard from Barry and the jury went to go and deliberate the outcome, he glanced over at Alex when she tugged at his sleeve.

[Thank you, for being with me today.]

[No problem. You put up a good show too you know.]

[I hate that man so much right now…]

[I have a big chunk of clay back at my place. Wanna take out some frustration on it after this?]

[…you know, I think I’d like that. Thank you, Nicolas.]

~I hope you’re somewhere praying, praying~  
~I hope your soul is changing, changing~  
~I hope you find your peace~  
~Falling on your knees, praying~

It seemed like forever before the jury came back in and took a seat again, a young-looking man handing over their decision to the judge as they all settled. “Mr. Abbott, please stand.” Alex held her breath as he did as he was ordered, gripping a loose part of Nic’s sleeve again to keep herself seeming stronger than she felt.

“Mr. Abbott, it is the unanimous decision of this court, that you are guilty of all charges presented against you. You will be sentenced to a length of ten years, eight of which will not be eligible for parole. During your incarceration, you will receive counseling to aid in your rehabilitation for when you are ready to re-enter society. Court is adjourned.”

Alex let out a breath she hadn’t known she had been holding at the final verdict, glad that for at least eight years, there was no chance of her ever running back into Barry again. Standing as the judge left and the bailiff came over to escort Barry back to his cell to await transport to prison, she wore a hard expression despite her trembling hands as he passed by. “Good luck when I get out of there bitch…”

“Keep it moving Abbott.”

Watching sidelong as Barry was taken toward the door near the back of the courtroom, Alex felt her anger boil up, quick steps taking her over as her heels clicked loudly on the wood floors. Waiting for Barry to turn his attention back to her, she simply stood there, a deep frown on her face and carrying herself tall. “You may spend the next ten years and more thinking about me Barry, but this is the last time I’ll waste anymore of my life thinking about you.”

~Oh, sometimes, I pray for you at night~  
~Oh, someday, maybe you’ll see the light~  
~Oh, some say, in life you gonna get what you give~  
~But some things, only God can forgive~

Not even waiting to see his response, Alex turned and stepped back behind the low wall to the benches where Nicolas waited for her. Managing a smile toward him, she took his offered hand and walked back outside, her spirits slowly lifting as they got back outside and into the sunlight. The wait for the bus was quiet, a light breeze blowing down the street and gently moving her hair over her shoulders. Reaching out to move it from her face, Alex leaned over and set her head on Nic’s shoulder, finally feeling free and more optimistic than she ever had in a long time.

~I hope you’re somewhere praying, praying~  
~I hope your soul is changing, changing~  
~I hope you find your peace~  
~Falling on your knees, praying~

Arriving back at Nicolas’ apartment, he kept his word, letting the two of them work on destroying and reconstructing a large brick of clay on a pedestal in his studio. While at first it had been more to blow off stress and repressed steam from the unavoidable court appointment, the longer she tore away and packed back on, shaped and reshaped again, Alex began to genuinely smile again. It was good to see that same smile that had first captivated him back on her face. The light shining in those bright blue eyes, hair falling around her face and over her shoulders as she moved and played with the clay.

Watching as she carefully moved some hair from falling in her eyes, he paused as she did the same for him, leaning slightly into her light touch despite the clay rubbing off her fingers. Staying still as she came forward, he let his eyes close as she pressed soft lips against his, hands settling on her hips and gripping lightly. Smiling back at her when she pulled back, he let her have some room, watching as she brought up her hands in the small space between them. [Can I stay with you tonight?]

[Okay.]


End file.
